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As you think about love and celebrate the holiday, be careful not to break any of these crazy, outdated laws:

  • On Sunday, it’s illegal for a husband to scowl at his wife in Michigan, and in Connecticut, its illegal for a husband to kiss his wife in public;
  • Speaking of kissing, don’t hold on for too long! In Iowa, kisses cannot last longer than five minutes;
  • Were you thinking of winning your girlfriend’s love with a nice serenade? We hope you weren’t planning on doing that in Michigan because that’s illegal;
  • In Kentucky, the state has your best interest in mind: if you can’t decide whether you and your husband were meant to be, you have three chances to get it right, but it’s illegal to marry the same man four times;
  • In Massachusetts the groom-to-be must prove his manliness before the wedding by hunting and killing either six blackbirds or three crows;
  • And finally, in West Virginia any unmarried couple who live together and “lewdly associate” with one another may face up to a year in prison. That law, however, was repealed in 2010.